How my Clothes fell off before the first song finished at the Hare & Hounds in Birmingham!


“I felt helpless. I could see the crowd laughing as they noticed my costume deteriorating.”…

I was young and naive but full of confidence as I turned up to one of my first gigs at The Hare & Hounds.

I had formed a band at Stratford Upon Avon College and we were massively chuffed when an agent booked us at the venue for a headline slot.

We spent a lot of time promoting it round the campus, created some good hype and had a good crowd attending the show. I definitely thought our image / presence needed working on and that I personally had to make a statement. That I did but…not in the way I was hoping!

I decided to wear some fake gold, necklaces, bracelets, rings as well as a big spike through my eyebrow. I looked a bit like a skinny pale version of MR T.

Everything I was planning to wear as a stage outfit looked quite cheap and tacky. I had no money, no job and any spare change I did have then, id spend on cheap cider at the Off-Licence! Nether the less I was a student trying to discover my identity and I thought I looked cool.

So for the show I’d be wearing a pair of £3 sunglasses, this hideous bowler hat, with graffiti writing all over it that I bought from The Bullring Market… and for some reason decided it would be cool to have a Cane as a stage prop whilst singing and fronting my band.

I went to BHS in Solihull, and came across this walking stick, which had a gold like, “Labrador,” head on the top as a handle and a screw extension at the bottom. The Kane cost £40 but the “0” had faded of the price tag. I took it to the till and caused such an argument with the lady behind the counter about false advertising that they sold me the Cane for £4! Result!

So anyway, there I was, with my new band, ready to take over the world with our music. The college fans packed in to the venue and gave us a generous welcoming as we began to perform our opening number.

 As I started moving this Walking stick around in a suggestive manner to the music…the gold “Labrador,” head fell off the top of the Cane! Disaster! I was left with a piece of wood in my hands…so the Cane lasted all of 30 seconds! I ditched the stick and continued jumping around the stage but then the screws in my sunglasses fell out and the lenses started to flap up and down off my face! I felt helpless. I could see the crowd laughing as they noticed my costume deteriorating so they had to go too. I threw them in to the crowd as if it was some sort of rock and roll gesture shortly followed by this hideous hat I was wearing and sweating to death in. So not even before the first song had finished…my whole outfit had perished. Not only that. Once I took all the fake Gold off I had been wearing …I was left with green marks around my neck and fingers. This was certainly not a cool look for the college bus the following morning!

I sometimes wish I had a photo of me in the outfit but at the same time maybe it would give me nightmares for the rest of my life.